Nuclear Assault

Trump & Putin Break Up! Trump Taking It Out On Assad

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On March 30th, U.S. Ambassador to the U.N. Nikki Haley said, “You pick and choose your battles. And when we’re looking at this, it’s about changing up priorities and our priority is no longer to sit and focus and getting Assad out.” 

But that’s back when Trump and Putin looked like this:

Since Trump and Putin had their tiff and broke up things have been teste to say the least.

A source inside the White House told us, “Our fight was huge. Big league. He kept coming to Mar-a-Lago, drinking all the vodka in the mini-bar, and then he’d pass out and pee in the bed. I told him I didn’t like sleeping in puddles but he wouldn’t listen.”

At our sources request, we aren’t mentioning his name. Since then Trump has gone on a rampage, bombing Syria, taking on Russian war ships, and sending a strike force to North Korea. He recently tweeted that he’s going to attack Egypt.

Today Ambassador Haley said, “So they [Putin] now have to answer for this! How can they with a straight face cover for Assad, because if they’re covering for Assad then what are they really saying!?…There’s a lot of answers that need to come from Russia [Putin].” 

She went on to say that regime change in Syria is a top priority. 

Putin put out a statement saying, “I’m sorry my love that I broke your heart but it’s over. Please move on.”